I am a Sex Therapist. What is it that I actually do?

Sexual concerns are more common than many people realise, yet they often remain shrouded in stigma, silence and oftentimes shame. This is where I as a sex therapists come in. A sex therapist is a fully trained and registered mental health professional who helps individuals, couples, people in relationships navigate a wide range of sexual issues, from intimacy challenges and anxieties to sexual dysfunctions and mismatched desires. My goal is to create a safe, judgement-free space where my clients can explore their concerns and work towards healthier, more fulfilling sexual relationships.

What techniques are used in Sex Therapy?

Sex therapy isn’t just about talking – it’s about exploring practical ways to improve intimacy and confidence. One well-known technique is sensate focus, developed by Masters and Johnson, which helps couples reconnect physically without the pressure of performance. Mindfulness and relaxation exercises can also be beneficial, encouraging people to be more present in their bodies and reduce anxiety around sex. Some therapists guide clients through self-exploration exercises, helping them understand their own desires, boundaries, and pleasure in a supportive environment. Good communication is key, so therapy often involves learning how to express needs and listen to a partner with empathy and understanding.

How does a Sex Therapist work?

Different professionals operate in different ways. You might have heard of classic psychoanalysis or CBT. I believe that sex therapy isn’t a one-size-fits-all approach, and I work with a pluralistic therapy model. This means that as a therapist I use a blend of different methods to suit each client’s unique situation. Some people may need to work through past experiences and emotional barriers, while others might benefit from practical exercises and structured strategies. The focus is always on what feels right for the individual or couple, ensuring therapy is flexible and responsive to each specific needs.

Is Sex Therapy couples work?

While it’s true I can work with individuals, a significant part of sex therapy involves working with couples and relationship structures as well. Many relationships struggle due to lack of communication, mismatched desire, or past unresolved issues. As a sex therapist I help partners talk openly and honestly about their desires, boundaries, and concerns. Therapy sessions often include structured exercises to rebuild emotional and physical intimacy, encouraging couples to reconnect in a way that feels safe and fulfilling.

How is Sex Therapy represented in pop culture?

When talking about my profession, people often reference Sex Education. The Netflix show has helped bring sex therapy into the mainstream, with Jean Milburn, played by Gillian Anderson, offering insightful (and often hilariously blunt) advice. The show highlights how common sexual concerns are and how beneficial therapy can be in addressing them. It reinforces the idea that seeking help is normal – and can lead to more fulfilling relationships and self-understanding.